I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
Randomize
