...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
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