3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
My one night stand asked me out to dinner. When he came to pick me up I got in the back seat. I thought he sent an uber. Awkward.
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
Randomize
