found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
Randomize
