My liver just broke up with me...
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
Realization: many of my behaviors would lead to me being stoned to death in a lot of foreign countries. God bless America.
Randomize
