Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
he laminated a picture of his dick.
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
This toilet bowl is my home.
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