I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
Within the hour, he sent me 8 texts and 4 voice memos. One of the memos was just him whistling for 3 minutes. ...It's official, I attract the crazies.
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
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