What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
Even the bartender felt bad for me
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
Randomize
