My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
