I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
