I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
the bastard is cheating on me with some sleazy barista from Starbucks
That’s his wife they’re back together
You say potato, I say sleazy barista
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