I'm sad I can't be there is wknd, I'm laying on the beach and daydreaming of you / crying a bit
I'm watching a porn and daydreaming of you. Sounds like we both need Kleenex
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
I woke up to the sound of gentle rain, only to realize I was laying under a urine trough in the men's restroom. Fuck you, bourbon. Fuck you.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
Randomize
