don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
I just handed the barista at Starbucks a panty liner instead of my card....maybe I should upgrade this Tall to a Venti...
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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