:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
Randomize