i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
Sex and sushi don't even sound good right now... I might be on my death bed. To my Liz, I leave my extensive movie collection and my drinking supplies. To Olive I leave my car. Cause every Scottish terrier needs a 2010 Camaro.
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
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