I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
Her roommate texted her and told her that her cat died. Now she's double-fisting bottles of wine while howling and wailing her dead cat's name. Not how I pictured this booty call.
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
Randomize