How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
Randomize
