his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
At least life still wants to fuck me.
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
Randomize
