i dedicated my morning wood to you.
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
