just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
I miss you like a fat girl misses the prom.
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
Almost screamed "GO FISH MOTHER FUCKER" at the girl I nanny today. Drunken card games shouldn't bleed into my sober life.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
Randomize
