Betty ford says i'm here all night
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
I was lying there too hungover to move when my dog jumped onto my bed and set half a calzone on my pillow. Best. Dog. Ever.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
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