perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
Randomize