I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
Randomize
