This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
Sooooooo Your wife and your girlfriend are making cat noises at one another via text
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
Randomize