Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
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