well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
apparently the officer said last night, "son, why don't you do yourself a favor and spread your legs so you don't keep vomiting on them". why can't I remember those nights?!
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
Randomize
