i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
Randomize