I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
Randomize
