Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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