So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
You can't special order awesome
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
So, the officer that worked my wreck, I'm rockin his world tonight. He saw me high on morphine in the ER. So he knows my level of crazy. Think he'll agree to wear his gun?
So many things can go wrong tonight.
The squirrels are partying on my roof again. Now they're just rubbing it in that I'm home alone on a Saturday night and they're having orgies.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
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