Annihilated within 20 minutes of arriving on Saturday, proceeded to hook up with him half a dozen times/almost have sex in the shed. Later on I text his boyfriend letting him know he's okay and that he's asleep next to me. If I could parlay this skill into a vital component of national security I'd be the Jack Bauer of homewrecking. Diner later?
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
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