i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
just so you know, your brother isn't driving home wasted tonight. he is, instead, in my dorm shower screaming about rubbing his butt with my loofah; thought you would be proud
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
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