Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize