glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
Alcohol only hurts me because he loves me.
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
Hey, remember that girl at rocklobster you thought was hot but were to pussy to talk to? You were right, her boobs are fake and she gives the best head on the planet. Can you come pick me up?
You're dead to me.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
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