Wow.. I was doing a mental check of my bank balance & I literally just said to myself: 'I have 27 dollars and a bottle of tequila til tuesday-ill be fine'
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
Pretty sure the delivery guy saw me taking a shit this morning
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
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