I thought you should know that you passed out in your trash can last night.
Thanks for throwing up on me.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
Randomize
