I just saw a hot homeless man
Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
My bar tender texts me around 5ish and ask what I feel like, so it's ready for me when I get home. All star service.
Dude. You are the LAST person that should live above a bar.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
Randomize
