how can u be prego again
her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish?
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
Randomize
