youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
It was around the time I started requesting "big girl straws" from the bartender for my jack and diets, that I knew I'd probably wake up with my sunglasses on and find my wallet in the shower.
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
Randomize
