Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
Randomize
