Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
One good thing about being really drunk when you go out to dinner is that the leftovers are a surprise. These quesadillas had shrimp in them! Who knew?
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
Randomize
