Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
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