whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
Randomize
