What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
Look, all I'm sayin is $2 boilermakers and an expense account are probably a bad mix…
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
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