Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
Randomize