? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
I'm drunk from drinking bourbon out of a "cupcake sippy cup" at the Denny's bar. What the fuck happened to the goals I had?
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
Randomize