I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
I can't watch pbs sober anymore
it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
She left a cookie cake on my porch, and the frosting reads "I'm sorry". She left me an I'm-sorry-for-punching-you-in-the-face cake.
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
Randomize
