no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
You layed on my kitchen floor with a pile of m&ms at your crotch, said "your lightbulb don't match, is that one new?"
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
Randomize
