Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
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