Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
Randomize
