i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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